#resound11

Synesthesia is my Superpower

I chose Synesthesia as my superpower because, while I find it a positive quality, it is often described as a mental disorder. Check out this article from Discovery magazine entitled, Top 10 Little-Known Mental Disorders, which claims,

“Synesthesia is a disorder resulting in the sufferer experiencing an alternate sense as a result of the first sense.”

Sufferer? Disorder? I love being a synesthete! Makes you wonder how many other things are considered to be abnormal/wrong when, in fact, they actually enrich people’s lives.

What is Synesthesia?

The word Synesthesia has Greek origins meaning, “joined senses.” The “disorder” is defined as an involuntary combining of two or more senses. Synesthesia takes many forms because there are so many ways to combine our senses. This means there is no single way to express this “condition,” although the most common form of Synesthesia, in which a person associates specific colors with each letter of the alphabet, has got a spiffy official name: grapheme-color synesthesia.

In other cases, instead of just hearing music, a person with Synesthesia might also see colorful mental images to go along with the tune, or upon hearing that it’s Wednesday, a synesthete might envision the size and shape of that particular day. To me, for instance, Wednesday is brightly-lit with a smooth texture, like plywood. In my mind, the entire week exists upon a horizontal plane in front of me with the days proceeding in a clockwise fashion.

Not Drug-Induced or an Overactive Imagination

As this Scientific American article mentions,

“For too long, synesthetes were dismissed as having overactive imaginations, confusing memories for perceptions or taking metaphorical speech far too literally.”

I’ve heard the “overactive imagination” thing my whole life, but what really irks me is when people insinuate my creativity is somehow drug-related. (Some of you may recall how I ranted about this a while ago in a post called Do Drugs Make You More Creative?)

Of course, I should add that, despite being touchy about people assuming I’m “high” when I’m just being playful, I took it as a huge compliment when a dear friend told me that during her one and only magic mushroom trip she kept thinking, “This must be what the world is like to Tui all the time.”

Even so, I felt rather validated when I read this section of the aforementioned Scientific American article:

“Synesthetes hear colors, feel sounds and taste shapes. What makes synesthesia different from drug-induced hallucinations is that synesthetic sensations are highly consistent: for particular synesthetes, the note F is always a reddish shade of rust, a 3 is always pink or truck is always blue.”

Exactly! It doesn’t change from day to day. In my case, A is yellow, the number 7 feels like shark skin, and the letter K is not only brown, but has a flaky layered texture, like mica or a Butterfinger candybar.

Synesthesia and Creativity

In the article, “Synesthesia is a Gift, Not a Disorder,” Giby George writes, “It’s no surprise, then, that synesthesia has been found to be most prevalent among creative individuals, specifically among artists, musicians, and novelists.”

Here are some famous creative synesthetes:

Billy Joel
Stevie Wonder
Vladimir Nabokov
Richard Feynman
David Hockney
Wassily Kandinsky
Duke Ellington
Pharrell Williams
John Mayer

(Oddly enough, while studies show Synesthesia to be twice as common in women as in men, I didn’t dig up the names of any female synesthetes while researching this post.)

Synesthesia is a Gift

Far from suffering from Synesthesia, I find that it enhances my creativity, and gives me a more poetic outlook on life. I tap into it often, especially when writing, playing music and learning languages. So rather than think of this neurological anomaly as a disorder, I agree with Giby George, who writes,

“Because of these additional capabilities, synesthesia should be termed a gift rather than a ‘neurological disorder’ or ‘condition,’ despite its physiological irregularity, as it allows the synesthete to appreciate more than simply one facet of a sensory experience.”

What Causes Synesthesia?

While research is being done on the matter, no one fully understands Synesthesia. According to that wonderful Scientific American article,

“Some scientists have suggested that everyone is born synesthetic but that the typical developmental trajectory results in these highly interconnected brain areas becoming far more segregated.”

Now isn’t that interesting? If everyone is born with Synesthesia, could retaining it be akin to maintaining one’s childlike curiosity towards life?

What are your Superpowers?

Before diving into this playful prompt, I decided to poke around and see what other bloggers were listing as their superpowers:

Paula Puffer includes Data Analysis in her list.

MaryBeth Smith possesses an enviable aptitude for sleep.

Kat has the ability to, “hear the stories that are only mine to tell.”

Morgan Dragonwillow was at a loss until her partner pointed out that art is her superpower.

#Resound11 prompt:

Today’s writing prompt comes from Jaemie Gyurik, who created #Resound11 to pick up where #Reverb10 left off.

Superpower: Faster than a speeding bullet. More powerful than a locomotive. Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound … We know you’ve got one. What’s your 2011 superpower?

For those of you going, “What the what? Stop!” Think about it for a moment: What have you learned that you can do better than anyone you know this year? What can you do that no one else can? Don’t be shy!

What is #Reverb11?

#Reverb11, #Resound11 and #Relish11 are just a few names for a fun end of the year project that mindful bloggers all over the world are participating in. Each day in December, folks choose a prompt from one of several lists, then use that as a launchpad to express themselves on their blog. The prompts are especially geared towards reflecting back on 2011 and paving the way towards a better 2012.

Everyone is welcome to join in. If you don’t have a blog, respond to the prompts offline through journaling, painting or whatever direction your inspiration takes you!

Reverb11 prompt: Fear

The Reverb11 prompt I’ve chosen for today’s post comes from Coach Jennie a.k.a. @CoachJennie, on Twitter, in case you’d like to follow her there.

Fear: If you could take a pill to *cure* just one of your fears from 2011, which one would you choose + why?

If I could cure one of my fears by taking a pill, I would cure my fear of driving. This is something I’ve struggled with for years, and while I’ve made progress, I’ve still got a long way to go.

For years, I was afraid to drive a car, but in 2005, I got my driver’s license. It wasn’t easy, but thanks to an extremely patient friend, I finally confronted this phobia.

With Alix as my teacher, learning to drive was exhilarating and fun. We laughed constantly, which was a helpful distraction. During one of our first lessons, a cop pulled me over – for driving too slowly! Even then, Alix and I could not keep a straight face. We were deep in the “giggle zone” and found it hysterical when the police officer explained that he had expected to find an intoxicated driver at the wheel, not a couple of laughing ladies.

Luckily, I didn’t get a ticket. This was a small town, and the cop was a regular at the coffeehouse where I worked. After that, when he’d come in for his daily jolt of caffeine, he’d often tease that, “The next time I pull you over it will be for a speeding ticket,” implying, of course, that I would soon be quite comfortable behind the wheel.

That’s exactly what I expected, too. Even though I’ve seen the “Wizard of Oz” enough times to know that a piece of paper does not impart a specific quality to its bearer, I stupidly assumed that merely having my driver’s license would banish my fear of driving once and for all. I didn’t expect to turn into Mario Andretti, but I figured that driving would become routine.

The more I drove around my little town, the more I got used to it – but only up to a point. I am still very nervous with highway driving.  Moving to big city threw me out of balance, too.  I felt like I was playing a video game at too difficult of a level. I wanted to bump it down a notch, but that was impossible.

Creative Distraction

Without Alix around to keep me laughing, I had to find a new distraction from my fear. Wearing a digital camera around my neck while I drove helped a lot. This kicked my creative side into gear, so that – instead of overthinking every move I made while driving – my mind was busy seeking interesting compositions. (Somewhere I have a bunch of photographs of bumpers, red lights and stop signs from this time period.)

Falling out of practice

My next move, however, took me to Naples, Italy. In a country of wild drivers, Naples is known for being especially insane. Just walking across the street in that city is a death-defying feat. Driving there was out of the question, especially for me.

Unlike America, where getting a driver’s license is a rite of passage for teenagers, I met plenty of Italians who don’t drive. I found it amusing that after years of shocking Americans by not having a driver’s license, I was suddenly impressing Italians by having one.

But don’t you want your freedom?

Back in the United States, when people found out I didn’t have a driver’s license they were often appalled, even confused. “You’re kidding!” they’d exclaim, before adding, “But don’t you want your freedom?”

I find it strange how, in America at least, the concepts of driving and freedom go hand in hand. I even remember a car jingle that went, “It’s not just your car, it’s your freedom.” I don’t want to get too off-topic here, so I’ll save my definition of freedom for another day, but, frankly, I think my passport has given me much more freedom than my driver’s license ever has.

Years of shame & embarrassment

I’d also like to mention that my fear of driving is not something I like to admit. People rarely understand, and it’s just embarrassing. On the other hand, I don’t think it’s good to keep things that trigger shame hidden away, either. It just adds power to that shame. So, for the sake of Reverb11, I’m going public with it.

I still don’t know why I’ve got this phobia

One thing I haven’t completely nailed down is why I have this driving phobia. What’s at the root of this fear, I often wonder, and does it even matter at this point?

As I admitted when I blogged about test driving an electric car, I am not a car person in much the same way that other folks might claim not to be a “cat person,” or to dislike sports. As Austin Powers might say, “Cars just aren’t my bag, baby.”

Nor do I get the concept of, “judging a man by his car,” although it’s a recurring theme in American movies and TV shows. A guy once picked me up for a date then became extremely insulted because I didn’t compliment him on the fancy-schmancy sports car he was driving. To me, it was just a car.

In fact, the only time I’ve been impressed by a man’s vehicle was when my now-husband picked me up in his Honda Insight. I found it so cool that he chose a hybrid, one that averages 72 miles per gallon. Smart, responsible, better for the environment, to me, at least = sexy!

And then came Texas

So here’s the state of my driving phobia in 2011. I haven’t driven since moving to Texas in the fall of 2009. Why? For starters, the only car we have is a stick-shift. This wouldn’t be so bad if we lived in a small town, but the way our area is set out, you have to hop onto the highway to get anywhere. Even with a camera around my neck the combination of highway driving and a manual transmission bumps me up too many levels in this particular video game.

That said, I would like to whittle away at my driving phobia in 2012. I don’t have a strategy yet. At this point, I am merely putting the thought out there. I’ll keep you posted!

What are your fears?

What about you? Do you have any fears that you plan to conquer, or at least tame, in the coming year? What are your strategies for dismantling them? Does any fear or shame surround your fear? If so, how do you deal with this?

What is #Reverb11?

#Reverb11, #Resound11 and #Relish11 are just a few names for a fun end of the year project that mindful bloggers all over the world are participating in. Each day in December, folks choose a prompt from one of several lists, then use that as a launchpad to express themselves on their blog. The prompts are especially geared towards reflecting back on 2011 and paving the way towards a better 2012.

Everyone is welcome to join in. If you don’t have a blog, respond to the prompts offline through journaling, painting or whatever direction your inspiration takes you!

The Virtue-Flaw Continuum

Have you ever noticed how people’s virtues directly link to their flaws? Look closely, and you’ll see that a person’s best trait often goes hand-in-hand with their most annoying. I think one of life’s challenges is to keep our traits balanced so they come off in a positive way.

When we’re out of balance:

Tenacity becomes stubbornness

Cleanliness turns OCD

Concentration becomes aloofness

Perfectionism turns into procrastination

Kindness slides into gullibility

Helpfulness becomes codependence

Outspokenness becomes opinionated

Honesty veers into tactlessness

Politeness turns insincere

Have you noticed any of these virtue-flaws in yourself? (It’s usually easier to see these things in others, at least for me!) Can you think of any more?

My Virtue-Flaw Continuum

Like everyone else, I’ve got my share of virtue-flaws. One that I became aware of this year has to do with self-criticism. This particular virtue-flaw cropped up back in March when, over the space of a week, five different friends told me I was the least judgmental person they knew.

I might not have thought much if only one person said that, but after so much repetition, I decided to ponder the idea. After all, one of the great gifts of friendship is when your pals point out stuff you are too myopic to see in your own life. It’s not all sparkles and unicorns, either. Sometimes what our dearest friends teach us about ourselves can be a bit painful and embarrassing.

This time, though, I was being complimented – and yet I found myself squirming at their words. A part of me wanted to reject their praise, as silly as that seems.

After mulling it over, I realized that my non-judgmental outlook directly connects to my lifelong struggle with self-criticism. A surprising benefit from feeling worthless for so many years is that I have no desire to make others feel that way, nor to pass that kind of judgment on them. So even though my self-esteem is a gazillion times better than it used to be, I have the happy side effect of not being overly judgmental. Even so – as my reluctance to accept their praise revealed – I still yank out a few mental weeds of inner criticism from time to time.

Having this virtue-flaw pointed out helped me realize how far I have come.

Day 3: #Reverb11, #Resound11, #Relish11

Today’s post is my response to Jaemie’s #Resound11 prompt for Day 3, which reads:

“Virtues: Yesterday we got down and dirty and revealed our 2011 vices; today we’ll wipe the slate clean and talk about what personal virtues we discovered in 2011. What good have you done in 2011? Where do you really shine? What have you done that makes you proud of yourself?”

#Reverb11, #Resound11 and #Relish11 are just a few names for a fun end of the year project that mindful bloggers all over the world are participating in. Each day in December, folks choose a prompt from one of several lists then use that as a launchpad to express themselves on their blog. The prompts are especially geared towards reflecting back on 2011 and paving the way towards a better 2012.

Everyone is welcome to join in. If you don’t have a blog, you can respond to the prompts offline through journaling, painting or whatever you feel inspired to do.